What do you get when you add four years of writing, editing, rewriting, editing, writing, rewriting and editing, add in a few spoonfuls of procrastination, wondering, doubting and delaying and finally a little dash of courage?
Well you get something like this:
Lord knows I forgot to include the zombies, wizards, mysteriously attractive vampires and (insert newest most popular trend here … I dunno … middle-aged housewives meeting attractive, rich bachelors with a penchant for poorly written hardcore sado-masochistic bondage) but, hey, there is always the obligatory sequel for that.
Now all I need to do is figure out how to get approximately 7,593, 821 people to buy it. Why 7,593,821 do you say? Well give or take a few hundred thousand that’s how many purchases I need to be able to afford this:
Current strategies include:
- Seven hundred thousand daily tweets demanding that you “BUY MY BOOK”
- A totally awesome YouTube video involving an intelligent looking author advising you that if you like Game of Thrones you’ll love this.
- Two thousand three hundred and twenty one daily tweets informing you that for every copy of Shiri that is sold 50% of the profits will go to the starving orphan children of Gondwanaland (may alter depending on most in vogue celebrity charity of the week)
Any additional marketing advice greatly appreciated.